Of Coffee, Kisses and Coats
by Rietta
Summary: A series of random unrelated drabbles featuring our favourite Teaboy and his Captain.
1. Stay

**Disclaimer- I do not have the pleasure of owning Torchwood. If I did, there would be less aliens and more beautiful Welsh vowels. As you can tell by the aliens, the BBC has the honour of owning the show.**

**Spoilers- All seasons, including CoE**

**Rating- T**

**Synopsis- A series of random short drabbles centred on our favourite Teaboy and his Captain**

**General Notes- Inspired by lots of different things. These drabbles are one-shots, completely unrelated.**

**Chapter Notes- A little 'what if?' moment from THAT scene in Fragments. You know the one I mean…**

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**Stay**

"I should go." He moves, reluctantly, about a foot. Strong hands tighten around his biceps, holding him in place.

"You still want that job?"

The question surprises him, but the answer is yes. He wants the job. He _needs_ the job. In fact, he'll do whatever it takes to get the job, and he knows Jack knows it too. Does he hate the other man for the fact that he will so obviously take advantage? He doesn't know. He should, but those fifty-first century pheromones are so intoxicating. He nods, slowly.

"Yes."

The man lying under him smiles, raises an eyebrow.

"Then you should stay."

Ianto doesn't protest as Jack draws him back down and seals their lips together in a searing kiss. It's better than he ever imagined, and he loses almost all sense of why he is here as he kisses back passionately. Almost. As they pull apart for air, the Welshman recalls what brought them to that particular location. Jack leans in again, and Ianto pulls away.

"What about the pterodactyl… Sir?"


	2. I'm Coming Back

**Disclaimer- I do not have the pleasure of owning Torchwood. If I did, there would be less aliens and more beautiful Welsh vowels. As you can tell by the aliens, the BBC has the honour of owning the show.**

**Spoilers- All seasons, including CoE**

**Rating- T**

**Synopsis- A series of random short drabbles centred on our favourite Teaboy and his Captain**

**General Notes- Inspired by lots of different things. These drabbles are one-shots, completely unrelated.**

**Chapter Notes- How I think I certain scene/article of clothing ought to have been handled in CoE. It's only short, but I don't think it needs to be any longer.**

**Author's Notes- Thanks to everyone who's added this to story alerts, it's nice to know people are reading! Especial thanks to Kate Andromeda for reviewing. I should probably tell you all though, reviews earn Ianto-coffee; and if anyone has any 'requests'/things they want to see written, let me know via PM or review and I'll do my best to write it for you. ; )**

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**I'm Coming Back**

"Get out of here!" Jack insists, and their lips meet in a passionate, desperate kiss. As they pull apart, Ianto feels something soft and warm thrust into his hands. He looks down- it's the coat.

"Keep it safe," Jack orders; then three words whispered: "I'm coming back."

It's not the words Jack wants to say; it's not the words Ianto needs to hear. But the meaning in them cannot be lost, and so the tears shine in Ianto's eyes as the lift carries him up and up, further and further away from the man he loves.


	3. There Was A Moment

**Disclaimer- I do not have the pleasure of owning Torchwood. If I did, there would be less aliens and more beautiful Welsh vowels. As you can tell by the aliens, the BBC has the honour of owning the show.**

**Spoilers- All seasons, including CoE**

**Rating- T**

**Synopsis- A series of random short drabbles centred on our favourite Teaboy and his Captain**

**General Notes- Inspired by lots of different things. These drabbles are one-shots, completely unrelated.**

**Chapter Notes- Was listening to music when a certain moment from 'Cyberwoman' popped into my head. Not Jack at his best, but Gwen may well be right when she says he's forgotten what it is to be human. A bit of angst to counteract the previous fluff.**

**Author's Notes- Thanks to everyone who's added this to story alerts, it's nice to know people are reading! Especial thanks and Ianto-coffee to sheerpoetry & ForeverBossy26 for reviewing. Again, if anyone has any 'requests'/things they want to see written, let me know via PM or review and I'll do my best to write it for you. ; )**

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**There Was A Moment**

There was a moment when he should have known, should have guessed that something was badly wrong… The way Ianto's body had stiffened when Jack called his name, the unusual length of time it took the man to turn round- that should have been telling, but Jack missed it. He realised, afterwards, that the Welshman probably needed extra time to school his face into that controlled smile. But even then, when he hadn't responded with a cheerful 'yes, Sir' immediately- Jack _really_ should have picked up on that. He really ought to have realised in that split second when he had honestly thought that Ianto might really deprive him of coffee. But his mind had honed in on _how_ to get the coffee, bypassing the question of _why_ he was having to work harder than usual to get it. Oh yes, he should have figured it out then. But he was too damn selfish to see what was right under his nose. He didn't see the emotional anguish the young man was feeling until it was too late. And that pained him almost as much as a month of takeaway coffee.


	4. Expected Surprises

**Disclaimer- I do not have the pleasure of owning Torchwood. If I did, there would be less aliens and more beautiful Welsh vowels. As you can tell by the aliens, the BBC has the honour of owning the show.**

**Spoilers- All seasons, including CoE**

**Rating- T**

**Synopsis- A series of random short drabbles centred on our favourite Teaboy and his Captain**

**General Notes- Inspired by lots of different things. These drabbles are one-shots, completely unrelated.**

**Chapter Notes- Dedicated to sheerpoetry for her lovely reviews. And also because it was her request. A little glimpse of that date Jack hinted at in Kiss Kiss Bang Bang. Don't ask where the idea came from, it is quite bizarre. Hope you enjoy, and as always PM me any requests. For those of you also reading 'Almost Here', the next update should be posted by the end of the weekend.**

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**Expected Surprises**

It was inevitable, yet at the same time it was so unexpected. Somehow Ianto had always known that his date with Jack would get interrupted by a rift alert. He'd just anticipated it being a weevil, or perhaps a sex alien, if predictability was being at its most interesting. But not once, even in the month it had taken them to arrange the date in the first place, had Ianto imagined even for a second that the date would be interrupted by a blowfish. Sure, they'd disposed of one the night Jack had proposed the date, but Ianto hadn't expected to see another one so soon. Certainly not one (clearly male) wearing a fluorescent pink bikini with a lime green baseball cap. Mind you, the last one hadn't had all that great a dress sense… But anyway. Probably what surprised Ianto the most was the fact that the blowfish could shoot straight after all the alcohol it had very evidently ingested. In a splendid moment of poetic justice, the bullet caught Jack straight between the eyes, smattering blood and gore over the coat resting behind the Captain. Ianto didn't think he'd ever acted as fast as he pulled out the only weapon available- a can of weevil spray- and launched himself at the blowfish.

Half an hour later, the date atmosphere completely ruined, the Welshman found himself with quite a variety of things. One dazed, drunk and vomiting blowfish: apparently alcohol and weevil spray didn't go together very well. One bloodstained Captain: which meant one more excuse to make up for the dry cleaners about the damage to Jack's coat. And one restaurant full of sleeping customers, waiters and chefs: ever prepared, Ianto had come armed with enough Retcon to make a whale forget the ocean. Surveying the destruction he had yet to clear up, the Welshman sighed. It could only happen with Torchwood…


	5. Conditions

**Disclaimer- I do not have the pleasure of owning Torchwood. If I did, there would be less aliens and more beautiful Welsh vowels. As you can tell by the aliens, the BBC has the honour of owning the show.**

**Spoilers- All seasons, including CoE**

**Rating- T**

**Synopsis- A series of random short drabbles centred on our favourite Teaboy and his Captain**

**General Notes- Inspired by lots of different things. These drabbles are one-shots, completely unrelated.**

**Chapter Notes- Ok, when I said the drabbles are unrelated? **_**Tiny**_** white lie- this one follows on from 'Expected Surprises' and is also dedicated to sheerpoetry, who inspired it. Kind of fluffy crackfic. Thanks to everyone who has reviewed, and do please keep the requests coming! All requests that have been made have been written and will be posted presently. Finally, as I'm sure any dedicated Janto reader already knows, 'Cariad' is Welsh for 'darling'/'love'.**

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**Conditions**

Surveying the room before him, Ianto sighed deeply.

"I gave you one condition, Jack- just one."

His companion followed his gaze, blue eyes gleaming as they danced over the array of desks, bins, computers, filing cabinets and, of course, the mandatory photocopier.

"What?" he asked innocently. "You specified no offices for the first date- unless I've forgotten how to count, this is the fourth."

Ianto sighed and rolled his eyes, turning to face Jack.

"I'm sorry, Cariad, but I don't exactly count any of the events you're referring to as a date."

Jack looked hurt. "Why not?"

Blue eyes rolled again. "Well firstly, we got interrupted by that blowfish and I ended up having to clean down an entire restaurant- and believe me, blowfish vomit is hard to shift! Secondly, I don't count me bringing you coffee on the roof at the end of a particularly bad day a 'date'. And thirdly… that Chinese meal you're referring to? You went with Owen in the end."

Jack bit his lip and looked down at the floor, the very image of a small boy caught with his hand in the cookie jar. "So no offices then?" His tones were the dictionary definition of disappointment.

Ianto let him sweat for a minute, then looked from his lover to the photocopier and back again, a wicked glint in his blue eyes. "Well, now that we're here, _Sir_…'

Jack's eyes snapped up to hold Ianto's as he slipped his arms around the Welshman's waist to pull him in for a passionate kiss.

Ianto held back, an ever so slightly evil smile on his face. "Oh, and Jack?"

"Mmm?"

"You still owe me a date."


	6. Communication

**Disclaimer- I do not have the pleasure of owning Torchwood. If I did, there would be less aliens and more beautiful Welsh vowels. As you can tell by the aliens, the BBC has the honour of owning the show.**

**Spoilers- All seasons, including CoE**

**Rating- T**

**Synopsis- A series of random short drabbles centred on our favourite Teaboy and his Captain**

**General Notes- Inspired by lots of different things. These drabbles are one-shots, completely unrelated.**

**Chapter Notes- Kinda OOC, kinda random. Could be related to 'Expected Surprises' and 'Conditions', could be set in a different timeline. I'll leave you to decide for yourselves. As always, Ianto-coffee for reviewers. Or Teaboys, if they prefer. ; )**

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**Communication**

"You still owe me a date. Jack."

"This is a date, Ianto!"

"No, Jack, this is sex."

"Aren't they the same thing?"

"No, Jack, they're not the same at all."

"Oh."

…

"Ianto?"

"Jack?"

"Do you fancy dinner and a movie?"

"What, now?"

"Why not?"

"It's 3am, Jack."

"Honestly, you people with your little boxes and your time constraints…"

"If I tell you to shut up and let me go to sleep, you won't start attacking the twenty-first century again, will you?"

"Not unless you ask really nicely."

"Thank you. Now Jack…"

"Ianto?"

"Shut up and let me go to sleep."


	7. Deference

**Disclaimer- I do not have the pleasure of owning Torchwood. If I did, there would be less aliens and more beautiful Welsh vowels. As you can tell by the aliens, the BBC has the honour of owning the show.**

**Spoilers- All seasons, including CoE**

**Rating- T**

**Synopsis- A series of random short drabbles centred on our favourite Teaboy and his Captain**

**General Notes- Inspired by lots of different things. These drabbles are one-shots, completely unrelated.**

**Chapter Notes- Back to the stealing and embellishing moments from the actual shows. A little explanation for another Ianto moment of silence, this time in 'They Keep Killing Suzie'. Hope you enjoy!**

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**Deference**

It took Ianto several long moments to think of a name for the knife that his boss held before him. It wasn't that he was struggling to think of something catchy- far from it! No, his brief silence had more to do with his shock that Owen Harper (sorry, _Doctor_ Owen Harper) had deferred to him. Ianto was used to being ignored or acknowledged in a derogatory manner- deference and respect from Owen was something quite new. He tried not to let his astonishment show in his face as he spoke.

"Life knife."

His colleagues accepted the name with nods, and here and there the odd smile. It was curiously reassuring.

Ironically enough, it was Owen's deference, as much as anything, that gave Ianto the courage to proposition Jack the following day. Or so he assumed. Then again, it might just have been sleep deprivation.


	8. Reasons

**Disclaimer- I do not have the pleasure of owning Torchwood. If I did, there would be less aliens and more beautiful Welsh vowels. As you can tell by the aliens, the BBC has the honour of owning the show.**

**Spoilers- All seasons, including CoE**

**Rating- T**

**Synopsis- A series of random short drabbles centred on our favourite Teaboy and his Captain**

**General Notes- Inspired by lots of different things. These drabbles are one-shots, completely unrelated.**

**Chapter Notes- Another from 'They Keep Killing Suzie', but angsty this time. Reviews rewarded with… you know the drill. I might throw the odd Jack out there for really dedicated reviewers… And do please keep sending requests! (TKKS requests will appear in this particular 'set' of drabbles, and so will be up in the next 48 hours.)**

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**Reasons**

"That's ten minutes… and counting."

Idly Jack wondered what had changed Ianto's mind. He'd been flirting with his youngest employee for months now, to no avail. In fact, he had all but given up; hence his incomprehension of Ianto's meaning when the young man propositioned him. So why now? Jack wondered.

Ianto didn't wonder- he knew. It was not, however, a piece of knowledge that made him feel particularly good about himself. He had heeded his better judgement and fended off the Captain's advances for so long now, but even when Lisa had been alive those advances, that incessant flirting, had made him feel wanted, attractive, desirable. But seeing the Captain so wound up about Gwen (added to a lack of sleep) had awakened Ianto's baser emotions- chiefly, jealousy. Watching Jack fussing over someone else, flirting with someone else, made him feel invisible, insignificant, unimportant; and he didn't like the feeling of that one bit. So it wasn't affection, or passion, or even a selfless desire to comfort his Captain that led to his proposition, although he could not deny his attraction to Jack. But no, what led him to proposition his boss was merely a burning need for self-validation; a need to feel important again. He just hoped the encounter was worth the guilt he was bound to feel afterwards.


	9. Buttons

**Disclaimer- I do not have the pleasure of owning Torchwood. If I did, there would be less aliens and more beautiful Welsh vowels. As you can tell by the aliens, the BBC has the honour of owning the show.**

**Spoilers- All seasons, including CoE**

**Rating- T**

**Synopsis- A series of random short drabbles centred on our favourite Teaboy and his Captain**

**General Notes- Inspired by lots of different things. These drabbles are one-shots, completely unrelated.**

**Chapter Notes- Yep, I'm afraid it's 'They Keep Killing Suzie' again! But fluffy not angsty this time. Gotta love that stopwatch!**

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**Buttons**

"Give Ianto a stopwatch and he's happy," Owen mocked the team's youngest member.

As always, Ianto remained unfazed. "It's the button on the top," he deadpanned.

As always, the beautiful Welsh vowels and steady countenance did unspeakable things to Jack's senses. "Oh baby, you can push my buttons any time," he murmured under his breath as he examined the gauntlet in his hand, nearly missing the look Tosh shot him. Smirking characteristically at his tech expert, he slid a hand into the gauntlet and slipped his professional mantle back on. Plenty of time to corner Ianto later…


	10. Questions & Answers

**Disclaimer- I do not have the pleasure of owning Torchwood. If I did, there would be less aliens and more beautiful Welsh vowels. As you can tell by the aliens, the BBC has the honour of owning the show.**

**Spoilers- All seasons, including CoE**

**Rating- T**

**Synopsis- A series of random short drabbles centred on our favourite Teaboy and his Captain**

**General Notes- Inspired by lots of different things. These drabbles are one-shots, completely unrelated.**

**Chapter Notes- Finally, a break from TKKS! Just general fluffiness. I know it's short, but I reckoned you'd forgive me because the fic that NightxBlossom requested didn't want to be a drabble so I posted it separately: 'Ten Minutes… And Countin'', if you're interested. ; )**

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**Questions and Answers**

Now he thought about it with a warm mug in his hands, Jack had to confess that a cup of Ianto's coffee was the best indecision settler he had ever come across. In the weeks after he had hired the Welshman, one question kept tormenting him as memories played idly yet obsessively through his mind: had he offered Ianto a job because his coffee was amazing or because the Welshman himself was delicious? As he took another sip of the beverage, the answer hit him right between the eyes: Both. The coffee was orgasmic- enough said.


	11. Choices

**Disclaimer- I do not have the pleasure of owning Torchwood. If I did, there would be less aliens and more beautiful Welsh vowels. As you can tell by the aliens, the BBC has the honour of owning the show.**

**Spoilers- All seasons, including CoE**

**Rating- T**

**Synopsis- A series of random short drabbles centred on our favourite Teaboy and his Captain**

**General Notes- Inspired by lots of different things. These drabbles are one-shots, completely unrelated.**

**Chapter Notes- And fluffiness again. Enjoy!**

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**Choices**

"No."

"Please….!" Jack begged, looking desperate.

Ianto shook his head firmly. "I said no."

"Why not?" Jack wheedled, sounding like the small child Ianto privately suspected he was.

The Welshman sighed. "Jack, it took me five hours to straighten out that section of the archives after your little… brainwave. I'm not happy."

"Let me make it up to you?" the Captain offered, flashing Ianto his sultriest look.

Fortunately, after this amount of time the Welshman was immune. "You're not going to change my mind Jack- no coffee for a week."

"Nooo! You can't do this to me, Ianto!"

"I think you'll find I can, Sir. Although…"

"Although?" Jack's tones switched from desperation to hope in a flash.

Ianto grinned. "I _can_ offer you a choice. No coffee for a week, or no sex for a week."

The look on Jack's face was worth the five hours of meticulous reorganising.


	12. Suits

**Disclaimer- I do not have the pleasure of owning Torchwood. If I did, there would be less aliens and more beautiful Welsh vowels. As you can tell by the aliens, the BBC has the honour of owning the show.**

**Spoilers- All seasons, including CoE**

**Rating- T**

**Synopsis- A series of random short drabbles centred on our favourite Teaboy and his Captain**

**General Notes- Inspired by lots of different things. These drabbles are one-shots, completely unrelated.**

**Chapter Notes- Backtracking to Fragments again. Not the best I've ever written, but the best I have to post at the moment cos I'm busy writing a bunch of assessed essays for uni. Thanks to everyone who has reviewed/alerted/favourited so far- you keep me writing. The usual offer of Teaboys/Captains still stands. Enjoy!**

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**Suits**

Tosh and Owen had always assumed that Ianto wore a suit to work as a habit carried over from Torchwood One, where it had been the 'done thing' to always look smart and professional. At Torchwood Three, that was not the case. In fact, it was downright daft for a field agent to wear a nice suit; so they'd been almost more surprised to see that Ianto persisted in wearing a suit once he'd been elevated to that status as they had been to see him out of his suit for that little excursion into the countryside so long ago. They couldn't quite believe that Torchwood One's field agents had worn suits, even though they knew that Ianto had only been a junior researcher there (clearly Yvonne Hartman had no eye for potential). Well over a year since Ianto had joined Torchwood Three, and the tech expert and the doctor were still wondering. Ianto let them wonder- he knew what they were thinking and he knew they were well wide of the mark. Torchwood One had nothing to do with his suits. The reason for them? That American accent still played fresh in his mind as if it had all occurred yesterday:

"By the way- like the suit."


	13. Bananas

**Disclaimer- I do not have the pleasure of owning Torchwood. If I did, there would be less aliens and more beautiful Welsh vowels. As you can tell by the aliens, the BBC has the honour of owning the show.**

**Spoilers- All seasons, including CoE**

**Rating- T**

**Synopsis- A series of random short drabbles centred on our favourite Teaboy and his Captain**

**General Notes- Inspired by lots of different things. These drabbles are one-shots, completely unrelated.**

**Chapter Notes- Inspired by several episodes of Doctor Who and of course one epic line in 'Out Of Time'. (NB. When I say 'twentieth century', it's because John, Emma and Diane were from the 1950s, not because I am unaware that we do in fact live in the twenty-first century. I am very much aware of this fact. John Barrowman informs me of it on a regular basis. Apparently, everything is about to change. Sometime in the next 90 years, anyway. But enough rambling!) Very much OOC fluff, but I haven't written anything in days because of uni assessments, so it'll have to do. Hope you enjoy; and thank you all for reviewing.**

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**Bananas**

"Of course, bananas are far more interesting," Ianto muttered, mainly to himself (though this was more because no-one was listening than out of a genuine desire to talk to himself in a supermarket doorway.) He didn't know why he was surprised. Be it the twentieth century or the fifty-first, bananas were always more interesting than whatever Ianto had to say. He vividly remembered, with acute embarrassment, the incident when he had invited Jack out to dinner on this very same spot. True, he had been hoping for an enthusiastic response; but "Ooh, bananas!" hadn't quite been the answer he was looking for. Not that Jack ever did anything he was expected to do. But still. The Captain's happy exclamations of "Bananas are good!" had failed to draw a smile to his face on that occasion. The advice "Always take a banana to a party, Ianto," had failed to raise so much as a twitch of the corner of his lips. Even Jack's banana-aided Viking impression failed to draw a reaction. There was just nothing to smile about in the face of being rejected- in public- for a bunch of bananas.


	14. New Understandings

**Disclaimer- I do not have the pleasure of owning Torchwood. If I did, there would be less aliens and more beautiful Welsh vowels. As you can tell by the aliens, the BBC has the honour of owning the show.**

**Spoilers- All seasons, including CoE**

**Rating- T**

**Synopsis- A series of random short drabbles centred on our favourite Teaboy and his Captain**

**General Notes- Inspired by lots of different things. These drabbles are one-shots, completely unrelated.**

**Chapter Notes- Wow, I've neglected this for too long! *blushes* Anyway, I wrote this one at New Year's and completely forgot to post it. So it's a bit late, but hope you enjoy anyway.**

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**New Understandings**

As a general rule, alien invasions wait for no holiday. New Year's Eve was no exception. As a consequence, the entire team were cooped up in the Hub tracking half a dozen suspicious lights as the New Year ticked closer and closer. As he waited for the seventh pot of coffee of the shift to brew, Ianto gazed round at his teammates. Owen was down in the autopsy bay, performing an emergency autopsy with very bad grace. Tosh was totally absorbed by her computer screen as she ran a couple of tests on police footage of the aforementioned suspicious lights. Gwen gazed unseeingly at a stack of police reports as she argued with Rhys over the phone. Jack paced the grating outside his office impatiently, glowering at Gwen and yet not saying anything: Ianto knew he would have the turn of the millennium on his mind as he forcefully reminded himself that the Welshwoman needed a life outside of Torchwood. In fact, Ianto was surprised that he hadn't let her go already. He could have looked through the police reports himself, with greater efficiency and a much better grace. Yet at the back of his mind, he knew why Gwen was still in the Hub: Jack needed his whole team under his eye, where he could constantly reassure himself that they were all alive. The Captain needed to know that he wasn't going to lose them. And as he placed five coffee mugs on a tray and gave the Hub one final sweep with his eyes before stepping out of the kitchen, Ianto understood perfectly.


	15. Just Because

**Disclaimer- I do not have the pleasure of owning Torchwood. If I did, there would be less aliens and more beautiful Welsh vowels. As you can tell by the aliens, the BBC has the honour of owning the show.**

**Spoilers- All seasons, including CoE**

**Rating- T**

**Synopsis- A series of random short drabbles centred on our favourite Teaboy and his Captain**

**General Notes- Inspired by lots of different things. These drabbles are one-shots, completely unrelated.**

**Chapter Notes- My first ever Janto drabble! (And indeed, my first ever piece of Torchwood fanfic.) From Ianto's perspective, and probably set sometime in series 2.**

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**Just Because**

I'm down in the archives, putting away the alien imaging device that Tosh has just declared safe for storage, when suddenly I hear footsteps in the corridor behind me. I do not turn around- I know those footsteps. They're the footsteps that make me smile day after day, week after week: so considerately soft and yet so self-confidant. The owner comes up behind me and puts his arms around my waist, gently turning me so that my back is against the wall and I'm staring into those intense blue eyes.

"Ianto Jones…" he breaths, the air whispering across my lips in an exquisite caress that is not quite a kiss.

"Jack Harkness…" I reciprocate, and then he does kiss me. It is romantic and tender, fiery and passionate, all at the same time. How does he do that? We break apart and he smiles at me; not the dazzling trademark Harkness grin, but the special tender yet sultry smile he reserves just for me.

"What was that for? I ask him, smiling goofily back. He kisses me lightly on the tip of my nose.

"Just for being you." And then he's gone, back to work, leaving me standing there with that goofy smile on my face and the alien imaging device bleeping away in my hand.


	16. Lisa

**Disclaimer- I do not have the pleasure of owning Torchwood. If I did, there would be less aliens and more beautiful Welsh vowels. As you can tell by the aliens, the BBC has the honour of owning the show.**

**Spoilers- All seasons, including CoE**

**Rating- T**

**Synopsis- A series of random short drabbles centred on our favourite Teaboy and his Captain**

**General Notes- Inspired by lots of different things. These drabbles are one-shots, completely unrelated.**

**Chapter Notes- And this time, my second ever piece of Torchwood fanfic. (Gosh, this takes me back. Can't believe it hasn't even been a year since I discovered the show!) Anyway, from Ianto's perspective again, and kind of angsty.**

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**Lisa**

I need to be thinking about Lisa. But how _can_ I think about her when my lips are just inches away from those of the man lying beneath me? An accident of positioning; the result of saving someone from a falling pterodactyl… And yet he smells so intoxicating… Damn those 51st century pheromones, whatever they are! Damn bloody Torchwood, throwing me into the arms of this man who will never employ me as a result of my previous occupation. Damn the organisation that didn't have the power to retcon me and make me forget its bloody existence! Yet how can I want to forget, when all I have left in my life is Lisa? Lisa. Damn it, I shouldn't be here! I should be back home with her. Fighting to suppress a deep sigh, I push myself up away from him and scramble to my feet.

"I should go…"

I'm half-way to the door, fighting back the tears, when that delicious American accent rings through the quiet warehouse, breaking my heart and fixing it all at the same time:

"I'll see you first thing tomorrow."


	17. Pain

**Disclaimer- I do not have the pleasure of owning Torchwood. If I did, there would be less aliens and more beautiful Welsh vowels. As you can tell by the aliens, the BBC has the honour of owning the show.**

**Spoilers- All seasons, including CoE**

**Rating- T**

**Synopsis- A series of random short drabbles centred on our favourite Teaboy and his Captain**

**General Notes- Inspired by lots of different things. These drabbles are one-shots, completely unrelated.**

**Chapter Notes- Eek, more angst! I promise you the next one is happier. This is another old one; my muse has been more preoccupied with my AU stuff lately. Thanks again to everyone who has read, reviewed and story alerted!**

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**Pain**

There was pain, there was pain, and then there was pain. Ianto could not remember a time when he hadn't hurt, couldn't remember the last time he had been genuinely happy. Happiness nowadays came in fleeting moments, scarcely lasting more than a few seconds. The rest of the time there was pain- pain layered upon pain upon pain. The physical pain was easiest to deal with- remnants of cuts and bruises and aches from his run-in with cannibals in the Brecon Beacons. Sometimes he even welcomed this pain- it reminded him he was still alive. Harder to deal handle was the pain of loss and loneliness: losing Lisa; losing the trust (if he had ever had it in the first place) of the rest of the team; losing his last remnants of self-respect as he sank into an obscure isolation. Trickiest of all to suffer through was the pain of confusion. He hated Jack Harkness- the man who had killed Lisa (the love of Ianto's life). He'd held a gun to Ianto's head and threatened to kill him too. So why did Ianto find those 51st century pheromones so intoxicating? Why did he want to grab Jack and snog him senseless every time his boss' face was within a foot of his own? Why did it hurt so damn much that Jack would never look twice at him after what he'd done? Because at the end of the day, that was the most agonising pain of all.


	18. Cheesecake

**Disclaimer- I do not have the pleasure of owning Torchwood. If I did, there would be less aliens and more beautiful Welsh vowels. As you can tell by the aliens, the BBC has the honour of owning the show.**

**Spoilers- All seasons, including CoE**

**Rating- T**

**Synopsis- A series of random short drabbles centred on our favourite Teaboy and his Captain**

**General Notes- Inspired by lots of different things. These drabbles are one-shots, completely unrelated.**

**Chapter Notes- Total and utter crackfic, not in the least bit serious. Written at work one slow Sunday back when I was a waitress. I was bored and decided to write a drabble based on the first prompt that came into my head (or out of the cake cabinet, as it happened). This is the madness that ensued. Hope you enjoy (and you can find the number for the men in white coats on the emergency list on the fridge.)**

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**Cheesecake?**

"Cheesecake?"

Ianto Jones stared at Jack Harkness in disbelief.

"It's as good a word as any," Jack argued. Ianto raised a cynical eyebrow.

"You want our safe word to be 'cheesecake'?" He could not believe he was having this discussion. But then again, despite his teenage shoplifting charges and employment with Torchwood, Ianto had actually been relatively innocent until he had met Jack. When that happened, everything changed. Jack had opened the young Welshman's eyes up to more kinky ideas than he had ever imagined existed. This trend looked firmly set to continue upon Ianto's discovery of Jack's large store of adventurous sex props. Ianto couldn't help thinking that Jack had moved the box to repose beneath the hanging rail in his closet specifically so that Ianto would find it. Surprisingly enough, the young Welshman didn't mind- it meant that although Jack evidently wanted to make their sex life a little more adventurous, he cared enough for Ianto to let his lover call the shots. Needless to say, Ianto was eager to learn and confident that Jack wouldn't coerce him into anything he felt uncomfortable with. Even so, Ianto had never expected to find himself standing in Jack's bedroom, discussing the relative merits of cheesecake with the Captain whilst his lover dangled a pair of fluffy pink handcuffs before his eyes.

"Yes, Ianto, I am suggesting cheesecake as a safe word." Jack's tones were cheeky and only held the merest hint of patronisation.

"Because I _always_ think about cheesecake when you're screwing me into the mattress..."

Jack grinned in the face of Ianto's sarcasm. "Cheesecake is good! And believe me, Ianto Jones..." he leaned closer, so close that his lips almost brushed against the Welshman's as he continued huskily, "...you'll be screaming for cheesecake by the time I've finished with you."

Ianto took a step back, doing that sexy sardonic eyebrow-raise thing again. "Doesn't that rather defeat the object? I though the point of a safe word was _not_ to say it? I mean, if I were screaming for cheesecake that'd mean you're pushing me _way_ too far."

"Hmm, good point actually," Jack conceded. "We can't be having that." One finger trailed tenderly down Ianto's cheek, and then the Captain grinned suddenly.

"Okay then, new safe word: 'sausages'."

"Sausages?!?"


End file.
